Monday, April 05, 2004

I'm a Marketing Genius 

Kerry's new attack talking point is that Bush is a "borrow-and-spend" president, and that this is bad.

Well, we're a borrow-and-spend country, so I don't know how effective this will be. After all, Bush could just get another credit card with a temporarily lower rate to pay off the national debt, right? I mean, he's pre-approved, and there's no credit check necessary (which is great, 'cause I'm not saying the guy's a risk, but let's just say some Harken shareholders might want to exchange a few words with him).

I think Kerry's message should be much simpler: THE FIRST NET LOSS OF JOBS SINCE HOOVER!

Then he should explain that Hoover was the president from 1929-1932, and he responded to the market crash by saying that, as his official biography puts it, "he would cut taxes and expand public works spending." Which didn't work. Though he did keep the budget balanced.

Bush's response to a recession, of course, is to cut taxes and start two wars. Which is a little more irresponsible.

Though I think an equally effective campaign move would be TV ads in every market showing a montage of Cheney sneering, Condi Rice seething with rage, and that cadre of old white men watching their ward sign the Ban On Made-Up Pseudo-Medical Sounding Abortion Process Thing. Darth Vader's Theme from Star Wars plays.

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