tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-65214802024-03-08T16:27:15.501-05:00Buck HillOnly Occasionally Celebrating Sunday On a Saturday NightUnknownnoreply@blogger.comBlogger520125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6521480.post-1175367596509223412007-03-31T15:54:00.000-04:002007-03-31T15:59:56.526-04:00What Does This Mean<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="http://photos1.blogger.com/x/blogger/4342/355/1600/421793/cartoon-civil-war.jpg"><img style="cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;" src="http://photos1.blogger.com/x/blogger/4342/355/1600/421793/cartoon-civil-war.jpg" border="0" alt="" /></a>Unknownnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6521480.post-1167161129194351602006-12-26T14:22:00.000-05:002006-12-26T14:26:03.896-05:00Happy Boxing Day<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="http://photos1.blogger.com/x/blogger/4342/355/1600/3881/alex.jpg"><img style="cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;" src="http://photos1.blogger.com/x/blogger/4342/355/400/432389/alex.jpg" border="0" alt="" /></a>Unknownnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6521480.post-1158523632078343442006-09-17T16:03:00.000-04:002006-09-17T16:07:12.106-04:00This Can't Possibly Help My YouTube Browsing<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="http://photos1.blogger.com/blogger/4342/355/1600/disneyreplacements.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;" src="http://photos1.blogger.com/blogger/4342/355/400/disneyreplacements.jpg" border="0" alt="" /></a><br /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="http://photos1.blogger.com/blogger/4342/355/1600/pleasedtomeetme.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 0 10px 10px;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;" src="http://photos1.blogger.com/blogger/4342/355/400/pleasedtomeetme.jpg" border="0" alt="" /></a>Unknownnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6521480.post-1155854823056892072006-08-17T18:34:00.000-04:002006-08-17T18:47:03.076-04:00Can't We Just Ban Grad Students?<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="http://photos1.blogger.com/blogger/4342/355/1600/clublaws.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;" src="http://photos1.blogger.com/blogger/4342/355/400/clublaws.jpg" border="0" alt="" /></a>Oh, christ.<br /><br />I look forward to the installation of NYPD-approved minders at, say, the rockstar bar on Siegel in Bushwick. Or Welcome to the Johnsons. Or, hell, any bar within a half-mile of Washington Square Park. <br /><br />Imette was 24, right? Did her license have a "should be kept away from sexual predators when drunk" restriction that an optical scanner woulda picked up?<br /><br /><i>"Today we begin the process of insuring that the safest big city in the world also has the safest nightlife," said Councilman Peter Vallone Jr. (D-Queens), formerly the single least popular guy at Fordham.</i><br /><br /><a href="http://www.nypost.com/news/regionalnews/imette_law_is_passed_regionalnews_stephanie_gaskell.htm">Imette Law is Passed</a> [NYP]Unknownnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6521480.post-1154208349868736372006-07-29T17:24:00.000-04:002006-07-29T17:25:49.886-04:00Back Monday, I PromiseAnd this is what I have to look forward to:<br /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="http://photos1.blogger.com/blogger/4342/355/1600/workemails.jpg"><img style="display:block; margin:0px auto 10px; text-align:center;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;" src="http://photos1.blogger.com/blogger/4342/355/400/workemails.jpg" border="0" alt="" /></a>Unknownnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6521480.post-1153881673715455092006-07-25T22:40:00.000-04:002006-07-25T22:41:13.736-04:00In case you noticed...I'm on vacation, by the way. All week in beautiful Minneapolis, Minnesota.Unknownnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6521480.post-1153424320066324092006-07-20T14:54:00.000-04:002006-07-20T15:38:41.276-04:00Tattoos<img src="http://photos1.blogger.com/blogger/4342/355/1600/singatat.jpg" class="center" /><br /><img src="http://photos1.blogger.com/blogger/4342/355/400/wonkettebanner.jpg" class="center" />Unknownnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6521480.post-1153110785817351402006-07-17T00:21:00.000-04:002006-07-17T00:33:05.840-04:00Dear Washington Mutual,<img src="http://photos1.blogger.com/blogger/4342/355/1600/feingold.jpg" class="center" /><br /><br />Yours,<br />AlexUnknownnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6521480.post-1152744233725215072006-07-12T18:42:00.000-04:002006-07-12T18:43:53.746-04:00Nope, Pretty Much Spot On<i>I think that <a href="http://althouse.blogspot.com/2006/07/cuter-than-glenn-reynolds-less-cute.html#115273785261773787">Alex just looks annoying in his photo</a>, cackling with cigarette-laden hand in the air, wrist cocked back. Like someone who would laugh with insufferable vigor at his own jokes. Perhaps he is nothing like this in real life, but that's what his pic conveys to me.</i>Unknownnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6521480.post-1150759252947513472006-06-19T19:15:00.000-04:002006-06-19T19:20:52.966-04:00CommentYou can tut-tut all damn day if you like, but I'm buying a drink for the first person to post my embarrassing Facebook pictures.Unknownnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6521480.post-1150656206848318962006-06-18T14:39:00.000-04:002006-06-18T14:43:26.866-04:00Tail of Two Cities<i>"Conceived in bankruptcy, the new nation founded its capital city on a site convenient to the purposes of a real estate swindle."</i><br />-Lewis Lapham, <i>Money and Class in America</i><br /><br /><blockquote>One, after admitting that "New Yorkers are smart, tough, hard working, and a lot of fun" (he neglects to mention our hip, black clothing, and our habit of lapsing into an Italian accent in times of stress), tells us that down South "Unemployment for educated professionals with a good work ethic is essentially zero" ("good work ethic" presumably means "white face and no desire for health care") and invites us to "Move to Texas. Have a baby. Shop at Costco. Vote for Bush." This sort of invitation to reform never ceases to charm us. In return, I invite the commenter to move to New York and start using hard drugs.</blockquote><br />-Roy Edroso, <a href="http://alicublog.blogspot.com/2006_06_18_alicublog_archive.html#115064720757514188">Alicublog</a>Unknownnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6521480.post-1149182417839506342006-06-01T13:19:00.000-04:002006-06-01T13:20:17.860-04:00Continuing the Fever Dream Theme<object width="425" height="350"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/tjjuoQQbhZo"></param><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/tjjuoQQbhZo" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" width="425" height="350"></embed></object><br /><br />Johnny brings gravity and great sorrow to the story of bird who never should've taken his ones to town.Unknownnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6521480.post-1149133704795971112006-05-31T23:47:00.000-04:002006-05-31T23:48:24.840-04:00No, I've Got No Explanation<object width="425" height="350"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/192sS5RuPCA"></param><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/192sS5RuPCA" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" width="425" height="350"></embed></object>Unknownnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6521480.post-1148568565880389512006-05-25T10:23:00.000-04:002006-05-25T10:49:25.966-04:00Brainknowledgeably WizzyOccasionally, in the course of writing an otherwise unremarkable post, you find yourself reading the <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Flavor_Flav">wikipedia entry for Flavor Flav.</a> And you see this...<br /><br /><blockquote>Born in Roosevelt, Long Island, New York, Flav, <b>a classically-trained pianist</b>...</blockquote><br /><br />...and that sort of brightens up your morning. In a WTF way.Unknownnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6521480.post-1148265591745237272006-05-21T22:31:00.000-04:002006-05-21T22:39:51.763-04:00If I Knew You Were Coming, I'd Have Added Text AdsFrom: <i>[Operative]</i><br />To: Alex Pareene<br />Date: May 21, 2006 2:38 AM<br />Subject: You better talk to her about it, you're her blogger now<br /><br />You understand that it was a reference to the fact that the first thing that comes to mind when someone says "internet videos" is porn, and the first funny porn joke I could think of is the ping-pong ball thing, innit? Since when are ping-pong balls a prop used solely by Asian whores? Assuming that that is an actual thing that is done, rather than a really cheap, easy joke? Hell, I would think whores would be above that kind of thing anyway...it's really more of a stripper gimmick. <br /><br />Anyway, I just enjoy the fact that Malkin thinks I'm the "bottom of the barrel." It's a shame that you have to bear the brunt of the U R SO GAY assault.<br /><br />I'm sorry if I offended Asians or women in general. I just meant to insult Malkin. <br /> <br />That said, it is kind of funny. <br /><br />I couldn't resist sharing this minuscule little brouhaha with [<i>old friends</i>] on the way to <a href="http://www.grumpysbar.com/nordeast.html">Grumpy's NE</a>, and their collective response, of course, was, "Who the fuck is Michelle Malkin?"Unknownnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6521480.post-1147906449998144262006-05-17T18:53:00.000-04:002006-05-17T18:54:10.033-04:00A Peek Behind the Curtain[14:18] <b>David:</b> do you like camping or outdoors-y activities<br />[14:18] <b>Alex:</b> not particularly.<br />[14:18] <b>David:</b> ok, goodUnknownnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6521480.post-1147144501568352622006-05-08T23:13:00.000-04:002006-05-08T23:15:01.586-04:00Job Listing: Intern NeededYour chance to be a famous official Wonkette intern! Please save me from having to repost this on Wonkette and wade through 200 unfunny applications for the couple great ones.<br /><br />Basically: If you applied before, it's 90% likely that no one got back to you and you're pissed and stopped reading in a huff and would like to throw a brick through my window. More power to you! Feel free to submit again!<br /><br />The job entails: Being online for 1 to (at the most) 3 hours a day every weekday, having a very basic ability to craft a one-liner or at least a sarcastic aside. There may be more responsibilities created, depending on how totally awesome you are and how much you needle me into letting you do more.<br /><br />So -- send me an email, no attachments, telling me who you are. I recommend sending it to alex [at] wonkette .com, mostly out of my totally futile and quixotic mission to maintain some facade of difference between work and personal life. Ha, right. Good luck.<br /><br />Benefits: monetarily small, but not non-existent. Also: you're totally invited to karaoke night.<br /><br />Washington DC residence preferred but not required by any means. College students ditto.<br /><br />Understanding why <a href="http://www.pitchforkmedia.com/news/06-05/08.shtml">this is funny</a> ditto.Unknownnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6521480.post-1146420848816717912006-04-30T13:25:00.000-04:002006-04-30T14:14:08.850-04:00Bob Dylan Gets Better Email Than You<blockquote>Today's e-mail comes from John Rudolph. ... He writes, "Dear Bob: I've got a hammerhead of a mother-in-law, an ugly, evil-lookin' old woman, so pitiful. She's careworn, drawn and pinched — gaunt and lank. I bought her a new chair, but she won't let me plug it in. She belittles me, depreciates me, disparages me. She downgrades me, berates me, censures me and condemns me, libels me and raps me, dismisses me and rejects me. Could you please play a song for her?" Well, thanks for the letter, John. Your wish is our command.</blockquote><br /><a href="http://www.nytimes.com/2006/04/30/arts/music/30play.html">It's All Right, Ma: Bob Dylan Turns D.J.</a> [NYT]Unknownnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6521480.post-1146413819981547472006-04-30T12:15:00.000-04:002006-04-30T12:17:00.000-04:00Down with CummerbundsHung over.<br /><br />Missed Ludacris, met Tucker Carlson. Oh, Washington.Unknownnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6521480.post-1145624505101097162006-04-21T08:59:00.000-04:002006-04-21T09:01:45.123-04:00WATCHING THIS BEFORE I HAD MY COFFEE HAS RUINED ME FOR THE REST OF THE DAY<object width="425" height="350"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/xNrmStOys1M"></param><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/xNrmStOys1M" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" width="425" height="350"></embed></object><br /><br />CAB CALLOWAY OMG MAX FLEISCHER WTF DOG BOYFRIEND ROTOSCOPING I WANT TO DANCE LIKE THATUnknownnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6521480.post-1145289959144030542006-04-17T12:00:00.000-04:002006-04-17T12:05:59.156-04:00Ineffectual? Sure. But No Way Is He Worse Than John Fucking KylFrom Time's list of the <a href="http://www.time.com/time/magazine/article/0,9171,1184028,00.html">"Worst Senators":</a><br /><br /><blockquote>In February [Mark] Dayton, 59, made another notable blunder. The Mayo Clinic, which is in Rochester, Minn., was opposed to a South Dakota — based company's plan to expand its railroads into Rochester because it would mean dozens of trains passing by the clinic each day. Dayton told FORTUNE magazine the Mayo Clinic is "worth a hell of a lot more than the whole state of South Dakota." He later apologized for the remark.</blockquote><br /><br />Correction: That remark actually makes him the <i>best</i> Senator.Unknownnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6521480.post-1143947343536588982006-04-01T22:06:00.000-05:002006-04-01T22:09:03.546-05:00FUCK YES<img src="http://photos1.blogger.com/blogger/4342/355/1600/skybar.jpg" class="center" /><br /><blockquote><a href="http://www.doubletreecrystalcity.com/">Skydome Lounge</a> - The area's only revolving roof top lounge with the best view of Washington, DC. Opens daily at 4:30 pm. Hungry Hour Buffet Monday - Friday 5:00 pm - 7:00 pm. Dancing nightly - cover charge. DJ Thursday through Saturday. <b>Karaoke every Wednesday and Sunday</b></blockquote>Unknownnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6521480.post-1143609750329089722006-03-28T23:43:00.000-05:002006-03-29T00:22:30.410-05:00Had I Known Then What I Know Now, I Would've Started With a Funny CNN HeadlineHey, I passed right by the 2nd Anniversary of Buck Hill, America's Number One Resource for bi-monthly uninteresting music news and in-jokes (I did manage to mark the occasion with a single-link post to a <i>Harper's</i> article -- dudes, no one pays me to write this shit, yr lucky when you get that).<br /><br />Anyways, I'll use this brief foray into the world of the first-person to say that it's been a fucking weird two years.<br /><br />And finally, a brief gripe: Please don't send press releases to my gmail address. I read everything that is sent to Wonkette, I promise. Anything else is cool, I like getting email, but press releases just piss me off.<br /><br /><i>Confidential to DC: Seriously, good pizza by the slice. All I want. And I'm not going to fucking Georgetown or something for it. Also: Where can I sing karaoke Steely Dan on a weeknight? That, I feel, more than meaningful romantic companionship, more than a sense of pride in my work, more than the ability to affect positive change in this fucked-up world, is all I really need right now. If you can help with those other things, though, let me know.</i>Unknownnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6521480.post-1143593701645764492006-03-28T19:39:00.000-05:002006-03-28T19:55:01.686-05:00Quick! Who In this Photo No Longer Works In the Music Industry?<img src="http://photos1.blogger.com/blogger/4342/355/1600/mats_06.jpg" class="center" /><br /><br />The Replacements (sort of) have reformed (sort of).<br /><br /><a href="http://blogs.citypages.com/jwalsh/2006/03/mats_06.asp">This is like the best news of the day.</a>Unknownnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6521480.post-1143555178393349002006-03-28T09:10:00.000-05:002006-03-28T09:12:58.406-05:00Yes! Yes! A Thousand Times, Yes!<img style="display:block; margin:0px auto 10px; text-align:center;" src="http://photos1.blogger.com/blogger/4342/355/400/fatigue.jpg" border="0" alt="" />Unknownnoreply@blogger.com