Wednesday, February 09, 2005

Shooting Dirty Pool, Talon Dirty Lies 

Ok, ok. I'm sorry. I haven't written a damn thing about what could very well be the funniest few days in blog history, or bligstory (short for "web ligstory"). Funniest, at least, since that thing last November -- what was it called? It turned my index finger magenta, that's all I remember...

To summarize, for those of you residing in the world of respectable newsmedia, a White House Press Correspondent working under the psuedonym (a practice not allowed for anyone else in the White House press corps) Jeff Gannon, famous for "asking" ridiculous soft-ball "questions" during press conferences and then transcribing GOP talking points at his phony Republican-front website Talon "News", was revealed to be a possible military-fetishist and closet-case named Jim Guckart -- the relevant details being summarized nicely here and here.

Things got weirder when his AOL personal homepage (confirmed as actually belonging to Jim Guckart, who is almost certainly Gannon, by a newsletter from his frat) featured a nearly nude picture of the guy, and he was further shown to have registered (but, sadly, left undeveloped) these (among many other) domain names:

Then he announced his retirement, tore down all his webpages, and went home. A congresswoman wrote to Bush demanding an explanation

And weirdly (though I don't recall seeing anyone else notice this), a site that up until fairly recently used to be another of Gannon/Guckart's personal homepages features this bizarre little free-verse poem, floating in an unlinked, context-less sea:



Don’t ask, don’t tell

Boy scouts

Girl scouts, lesbo camp

Civil unions, gay marriage

What the hell does it mean? Was Guckart hacked? Who wrote this? Are these unreleased Scissor Sisters lyrics?

{Note as to why this is important: Is Gannon just a run-of-the-closet wingut, a harmless inept crank whom we've persecuted unjustly? Sadly, No -- he was working under a psuedonym at a White House that doesn't even allow married female journalists to use their professional/maiden names. If sites like Militaryescortsm4m.com ever had content on them along the lines of what their names suggest, it's an act of blatant (and possibly illegal) hypocrisy by a very loud and proud conservative Christian. Oh, and also -- "Gannon" is one of those lucky journalists being subpoenaed by the grand jury looking into the Plame case, on account of his having access to a CIA memo naming Plame as an operative -- a memo that (although possibly forged) no one else had. The guy clearly has powerful friends -- that fact that they're trying to use this nimrod who is but slightly worse at covering his tracks than E. Howard Hunt proves only that, as we've known all along, our current rulers' capacity for iniquity is matched only by their stunning incompetence.}

Sadly, No! has been added to the blogroll (short for "web logrolling"). I'm really not sure why they weren't there before, but that's life.

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